If doing the right thing was easy, we'd all be doing it everyday. However, because it isn't, very often we'd rather not and choose to do the thing that's wrong because it's easier.
You all know already that I love to talk about TV shows that teach something. One of them is Blue Bloods, and while I'm not a Catholic I do agree with many topics of conversation that happen around the Reagan family dinner table or side discussions. Last night's episode was a rerun, but I still managed to take away something.
"It's hard to know what to do when you're not sure what the right thing is." When the PC, Frank Reagan, said this to his daughter, Erin, they both knew what the right thing was. The truth of the statement remains the same; doing the right thing is hard and in the situation with Erin, she could lose her job. I don't want to spoil the ending for those who don't watch this show but might watch it later, so all I will say is that she did what was right despite her opposition.
In my life now, I face the question, what is the right thing to do? My heart is in so much pain and I don't want it to cloud my judgement. Forming relationships of any kind have been tough since the beginning especially lasting ones. I know I'm different. I know I'm sensitive, but I also know that I care a lot. Sometimes that seems to mean that it's inevitable that I will get hurt. Humans disappoint and I have to remind myself of that daily as well as not to expect so much. In my mind, I have a vision of what a good friendship looks like. While everyone has a different perspective on what love is or what respect is, I can't devalue my values simply because few people understand or respect my views.
Another awesome quote (from Instagram, not a TV show), "You don't gotta drop it low if you raise your standards." How true is that!? I shouldn't have to disregard my values simply because the person I want to have a friendship or relationship with doesn't agree.
My sister and I don't see eye to eye anymore and that doesn't mean I should let go of my beliefs. Just means I can't expect the same relationship we had growing up. We need to find common ground elsewhere. When that will happen, I have no idea. How to go about forging a new relationship with her, I have no idea. What the right thing is to do concerning my sister, I have no idea. I do know that no matter how many fights we have or tears we shed, we are still sisters. It will take time to figure out what the right thing is, but that shouldn't stop us from trying.
Saturday, December 3, 2016
Tuesday, November 15, 2016
Be You
Funny, how movies I've seen a bunch of times still manages to teach me something new. Mom's Night Out is a crazy fun movie to watch full of laughs but when Bones, a stranger turned friend of Allyson's says something profound, it really makes one stop and think. Have any of you felt like everything you did wasn't enough? Have you felt worthless to your friends, family and maybe even to God? Since I've moved, I've felt that way hundreds of times. I try so hard to make friends and so many toss me to the curb or treat me with disrespect. Sometimes I feel like giving up and just trying a new city altogether, but then I meet new people and my heart feels light again.
Bones, not a man of God, said this..."He loves you, Charles. No matter who you are or what you do or how far you run. Jesus will always be loving you with his arms open wide just for being you."
It's crazy how often we think we have to earn His love or be someone we're not in order for others to like us. He created us as individuals and He does NOT make mistakes. He could have made us all robots but He didn't....for a reason. We each bring something unique into this world, our families and friends.
Being me took so long to come out, but when I do share my stories and be myself, I've found that some will accept and some will reject. Very often those who reject you isn't a reflection of how awful of a person you are but rather a reflection of how immature they are or unwilling to see your point of view. If you are true to yourself, respectful towards others I can't believe you'll never find people who will love you for who you are. God certainly will never stop loving you, we can always count on that.
God made each animal differently too, an eagle for example, cares for its young like its supposed to. It's a beautiful thing because its doing exactly what God wants.
We beat ourselves up trying to be someone/something else. STOP! PLEASE! Be you! Be the person God made you to be and you will be much happier. :)
Bones, not a man of God, said this..."He loves you, Charles. No matter who you are or what you do or how far you run. Jesus will always be loving you with his arms open wide just for being you."
It's crazy how often we think we have to earn His love or be someone we're not in order for others to like us. He created us as individuals and He does NOT make mistakes. He could have made us all robots but He didn't....for a reason. We each bring something unique into this world, our families and friends.
Being me took so long to come out, but when I do share my stories and be myself, I've found that some will accept and some will reject. Very often those who reject you isn't a reflection of how awful of a person you are but rather a reflection of how immature they are or unwilling to see your point of view. If you are true to yourself, respectful towards others I can't believe you'll never find people who will love you for who you are. God certainly will never stop loving you, we can always count on that.
God made each animal differently too, an eagle for example, cares for its young like its supposed to. It's a beautiful thing because its doing exactly what God wants.
We beat ourselves up trying to be someone/something else. STOP! PLEASE! Be you! Be the person God made you to be and you will be much happier. :)
Saturday, October 22, 2016
Keep On Diving
The first two episodes in season 2 of Supergirl have been more in depth and coincidentally things I really needed to hear. Cat Grant is an amazing character and I love the pearls of wisdom she gives out to Kara and others around her. I think this was the first time where she took her own advice. We shall see what happens with that in the coming episodes.
Cat Grant tells Kara to keep on diving to find out what she wants in life. In the two months since moving to Denver, I've had highs and super lows. Obviously, there is no place on earth that is perfect and no stage of life where everything is rosy all the time. However, when numerous sad/bad things happen all in a row, it begs the question of what am I really doing here? Was it a mistake to move and strike out on my own? I've given both those questions and more a whole lot of thought.While it is tough being alone, trying to make new friends and juggling responsibilities, it's rewarding in some ways. I do like being on my own versus relying on others. I can buy the food I want, go to festivals, invite friends over or just chill all night watching NCIS. It's part of growing up and like it or not....that's what I'm doing.
Kara mentioned to Cat Grant that she finally knew what she wanted to be, a reporter because it challenges her and makes her a better version of herself. I think everyone should strive to get to that place in life. We should evaluate our lives from time to time and see where we are and ask where we want to go. I honestly have no idea how to answer that question. For so long, I've known what I wanted to do but since junior year of college I've wondered what else beyond just being a writer is out there for me. Now, I refuse to be a reporter. I know that's not the way to go, however what kind of writing besides novel makes me happy? Makes me a better version of myself? That I do not know, but I will find out!
Find what motivates you. Find what makes you happy to get out of that warm bed. Keep on diving!
Cat Grant tells Kara to keep on diving to find out what she wants in life. In the two months since moving to Denver, I've had highs and super lows. Obviously, there is no place on earth that is perfect and no stage of life where everything is rosy all the time. However, when numerous sad/bad things happen all in a row, it begs the question of what am I really doing here? Was it a mistake to move and strike out on my own? I've given both those questions and more a whole lot of thought.While it is tough being alone, trying to make new friends and juggling responsibilities, it's rewarding in some ways. I do like being on my own versus relying on others. I can buy the food I want, go to festivals, invite friends over or just chill all night watching NCIS. It's part of growing up and like it or not....that's what I'm doing.
Kara mentioned to Cat Grant that she finally knew what she wanted to be, a reporter because it challenges her and makes her a better version of herself. I think everyone should strive to get to that place in life. We should evaluate our lives from time to time and see where we are and ask where we want to go. I honestly have no idea how to answer that question. For so long, I've known what I wanted to do but since junior year of college I've wondered what else beyond just being a writer is out there for me. Now, I refuse to be a reporter. I know that's not the way to go, however what kind of writing besides novel makes me happy? Makes me a better version of myself? That I do not know, but I will find out!
Find what motivates you. Find what makes you happy to get out of that warm bed. Keep on diving!
Sunday, October 2, 2016
Dare to Defy
I'm really sad that Supergirl moved to the CW instead of being on CBS again this coming season. Don't have cable in my apartment and the CW doesn't offer captions with their online streaming, as far as I know. This show has caused me to think about my life in different ways -- good ways. The lessons I've learned I've posted on this blog for the last year and I had hoped to do it again, but I may not be able to. Once these are on DVD though, I will be sure to get them. I love how clean this show is and I hope it will continue to be so, but I won't hold my breath.
Dare to Defy is her motto and I've been thinking about this a lot because I still struggle how to identify myself sometimes. There are days/weeks where I know who I am and refuse to let someone pull me or make me second-guess myself. Then there are other times where I feel like crying; like I'm starting all over again.
I don't feel African American nor Deaf. I know based on my skin color, I am. I know based on my degree of hearing loss, I am. However, very often I am not accepted in either of those groups. Mind you, there are those who do and I'm grateful for them. I didn't grow up in a predominantly black neighborhood. I didn't grow up with ASL. I'm not "down with it" nor am I fluent in ASL. I have quite a few white friends, Asian friends, friends of the African persuasion, hearing friends and Deaf friends. I like being around all of them. I especially enjoy being able to be myself around them. I don't have to talk like I'm from the Bronx or pretend I can fingerspell like lightening.
When people ask me if I've watched the Color Purple or The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air and when I say, "No," I'm greeted with a look that says, "Exccuuuuuse me?!" People ask me whether I'm Deaf or not and when I say I am deaf, they're not sure if I'm telling the truth. "Are you really Deaf or are you really hard-of-hearing?" Today, that question threw me. For so long I struggled with how to identify myself in that manner. At first it was, no I'm not Deaf because in my mind I thought Deaf meant I was stupid. The way hearing people referred to me in high school was as if I was stupid. There are many things I can't hear without my hearing aids. With them, I can understand the world around me better so in a way with them I become hard-of-hearing. At the same time, I'm not sure I like that term. While I didn't grow up D/deaf at all, I refer to myself as deaf (not Deaf) because I didn't grow up with ASL or understanding Deaf Culture. I grew up in a hearing environment and was taught how to speak.
I don't like feeling on the fence and I wish I could just be one and be done with it. No questions asked. I don't like having to defend how I label myself. I don't even like labeling myself at all. Dare to defy has such a deeper meaning for me. Even if others try to put me in a box, I won't fit. I refuse to fit.
The Most Hated Religions of the 21st Century
I see these Coexist bumper stickers everywhere and people going on and on about acceptance instead of hate. Why is it ok to hate Muslims, but it's not ok to hate gay people? While I don't believe we should hate anyone for any reason, some people follow this absurd logic. While acceptance shouldn't be pushed so much, I believe respect should instead.
This topic has been on my mind for quite some time. Muslims and Christians, people hate beyond words and I wish people could show more respect...actually respect at all. I also wish that the media would stop blowing things out of proportion and/or giving us half if not only a quarter of the whole story. It's because of this fear/hatred of Muslim's in particular we get so antsy when we see someone wearing a hijab in an airport, on a bus or simply walking into a store. I don't like it. I wish I could stop thinking the worst when I see these people. There are many innocent Muslims who follow their religion as Allah actually instructed. They aren't radicals. They are simply individuals who want a better life for themselves and their children.
In the world of Christianity, many people hate not only the religion, but the philosophy, way of life and the person behind it all. Gods has rules for us and specific guidelines for His people. Real Christians are the ones who actually follow them. For instance, not swearing/taking God's name in vain. Someone who truly wants to be closer to God won't utter those kinds of words and if they do by accident, they will show regret. Like everyone else, Christians make mistakes and I think as individuals whether we follow Christianity or not should be aware of this and be mindful of this fact.
Muslims and Christians have quite a few things in common such as how much the religions governs our way of life. Both groups attend church/mosque on a regular basis, if they are true to their beliefs. They also desire to honor their God by living the right way based on what their Holy Book says. There are hundreds of people who call themselves Muslims or Christians, but until you look at their lives, you can't take that at face value. They may not be true to their religion. I don't understand how/why people call themselves Christians when all they really do that's even close to what Christ preaches is go to church every so often. As if that give them God points or something. NO! Being a Christian is about following Christ. If you don't obey His commands on a daily basis, what are you really? If you call yourself a Muslim, but kill innocent people left and right, what are you really? You're just a human being who isn't a true follower. Neither Allah nor Christ teaches that it's ok to be complacent or pick and choose whatever rules you want to follow and still call yourself a true follower.
So why do we hate Christians and Muslims? In my opinion, it's because the belies are so close to the heart and daily life. It effects how we talk, where we go and who we interact with. True believers want to do what's right and the rest of the world wants to do whatever feels good at the time. As our society goes farther away from treating everyone with respect regardless of whether or not you agree with them, both these religions will never seek peace. While neither are persecuted like they are in some other countries, they do live in fear. Fear of ridicule, fear of being ignored and fear of being losing friends/family.
Stop hating on others for what they believe. There are plenty of issues I don't see eye to eye with individuals, but I don't hate a person who is Pro-Abortion/Choice. I don't hate the person who thinks pushing uni-sex bathrooms for the 1% of the population that calls themselves transgender is a good thing. I really don't like it when people call themselves Christians or any other religion and don't even follow the basic teachings. Sure, we have set-backs and months/years where we've desensitized ourselves to the point where we don't even realize we aren't true. It happens and I hope someone in your life cares enough about you to point that out so that you can change for the better and become the person God wants you to be.
Don't hate. Appreciate our differences no matter who we choose to vote for, what god we follow or side of the issue we stand.
This topic has been on my mind for quite some time. Muslims and Christians, people hate beyond words and I wish people could show more respect...actually respect at all. I also wish that the media would stop blowing things out of proportion and/or giving us half if not only a quarter of the whole story. It's because of this fear/hatred of Muslim's in particular we get so antsy when we see someone wearing a hijab in an airport, on a bus or simply walking into a store. I don't like it. I wish I could stop thinking the worst when I see these people. There are many innocent Muslims who follow their religion as Allah actually instructed. They aren't radicals. They are simply individuals who want a better life for themselves and their children.
In the world of Christianity, many people hate not only the religion, but the philosophy, way of life and the person behind it all. Gods has rules for us and specific guidelines for His people. Real Christians are the ones who actually follow them. For instance, not swearing/taking God's name in vain. Someone who truly wants to be closer to God won't utter those kinds of words and if they do by accident, they will show regret. Like everyone else, Christians make mistakes and I think as individuals whether we follow Christianity or not should be aware of this and be mindful of this fact.
Muslims and Christians have quite a few things in common such as how much the religions governs our way of life. Both groups attend church/mosque on a regular basis, if they are true to their beliefs. They also desire to honor their God by living the right way based on what their Holy Book says. There are hundreds of people who call themselves Muslims or Christians, but until you look at their lives, you can't take that at face value. They may not be true to their religion. I don't understand how/why people call themselves Christians when all they really do that's even close to what Christ preaches is go to church every so often. As if that give them God points or something. NO! Being a Christian is about following Christ. If you don't obey His commands on a daily basis, what are you really? If you call yourself a Muslim, but kill innocent people left and right, what are you really? You're just a human being who isn't a true follower. Neither Allah nor Christ teaches that it's ok to be complacent or pick and choose whatever rules you want to follow and still call yourself a true follower.
So why do we hate Christians and Muslims? In my opinion, it's because the belies are so close to the heart and daily life. It effects how we talk, where we go and who we interact with. True believers want to do what's right and the rest of the world wants to do whatever feels good at the time. As our society goes farther away from treating everyone with respect regardless of whether or not you agree with them, both these religions will never seek peace. While neither are persecuted like they are in some other countries, they do live in fear. Fear of ridicule, fear of being ignored and fear of being losing friends/family.
Stop hating on others for what they believe. There are plenty of issues I don't see eye to eye with individuals, but I don't hate a person who is Pro-Abortion/Choice. I don't hate the person who thinks pushing uni-sex bathrooms for the 1% of the population that calls themselves transgender is a good thing. I really don't like it when people call themselves Christians or any other religion and don't even follow the basic teachings. Sure, we have set-backs and months/years where we've desensitized ourselves to the point where we don't even realize we aren't true. It happens and I hope someone in your life cares enough about you to point that out so that you can change for the better and become the person God wants you to be.
Don't hate. Appreciate our differences no matter who we choose to vote for, what god we follow or side of the issue we stand.
Saturday, August 27, 2016
The Past Will Rob You If You Let It
Lately, I have been having flash backs from my past. Certain words used to cut me up or hard looks meant to keep me from saying what I really want to say. Sometimes it's just the fact that my friends stood idly by while this all happened. I wonder what would have happened if I knew how to stand up for myself better back then. Though honestly, I think I would have been expelled if I had said or done the things I wanted to. Instead I kept my head down, but I can't help but wonder if I made the right decision.
I've noticed that my past has continued to haunt me in various ways both night and day. Whether or not they were mistakes that I personally made or things that people did to me that have caused me to be more cautious and sometimes down right scared. There are things that I don't want repeated.
I wish I weren't so scared of so many things in life. I wish I could feel more free. On the flip side, as a young woman I realize that it pays to be careful. I don't want to ever have to break a man's nose or use mace, but it's something that many of us have had to do. I don't like being on high alert every time someone walks too close behind me. However, being like that has probably helped me avoid serious problems.
Not letting the past rob me from living my life the way I want to is a struggle. While I don't want to be the cause for getting into trouble, I don't want to be nervous about everything either. It's a growing up process, I know.
God....we have some serious work to do here. Being an adult is hard, but I'm looking forward to becoming the best woman of God I can be.
I've noticed that my past has continued to haunt me in various ways both night and day. Whether or not they were mistakes that I personally made or things that people did to me that have caused me to be more cautious and sometimes down right scared. There are things that I don't want repeated.
I wish I weren't so scared of so many things in life. I wish I could feel more free. On the flip side, as a young woman I realize that it pays to be careful. I don't want to ever have to break a man's nose or use mace, but it's something that many of us have had to do. I don't like being on high alert every time someone walks too close behind me. However, being like that has probably helped me avoid serious problems.
Not letting the past rob me from living my life the way I want to is a struggle. While I don't want to be the cause for getting into trouble, I don't want to be nervous about everything either. It's a growing up process, I know.
God....we have some serious work to do here. Being an adult is hard, but I'm looking forward to becoming the best woman of God I can be.
Thursday, July 21, 2016
The Person With A Gun
As you are all well aware, there have been multiple shootings in various cities across the nation. In the past week or two, it's been cop shootings following the deaths of many black individuals.
Being an African American, I hope no one will accuse me of being racist or uneducated when I say that it pays to look at the whole picture. For instance, the videos of Alton Sterling that are circulating the internet don't really give a clear picture who was in the right or who was in the wrong. There are conflicting accounts as to if he was holding a gun or not. My point is that we shouldn't rush to conclusions and assume police brutality because the man shot was black and the man who shot him wore blue.
Now, should we be outraged when it is indeed police brutality and/or when unnecessary force is used, YES! This doesn't mean, however, we as Americans/African Americans/black people should start yelling at the cops, killing them and being disrespectful. Both sides need to be able to respect the other before assuming things based on skin color or uniform. Just like not every black person is the same, not every cop is the same.
No matter who dies via gun shot(s) makes me sad. However, not all shootings are unjust. If the perpetrator is holding a gun or something that looks like a gun, I'm not surprised when the cop or other person takes a shot. Running away or taking your sweet old time putting your hands above your head isn't exactly telling the police that you are innocent. The more idiots that do these things or try to get away with breaking the law, the more likely police are going to go into altercations with our race ready to use deadly force. The more idiots in blue that kick black Americans or shoot those who are on the ground, we will view cops as people to fight.
This video makes me so sad because it's people like this who try to taunt and make everything the policeman's fault. They think every policeman is like the idiots who have been proven to be corrupt and racist. Not every cop is like that!
Just remember 9 times our of 10, we don't know the whole story. Who's to blame for that? The media. Not African Americans. Not cops. Let's unite against the real enemy here in this instance.
Being an African American, I hope no one will accuse me of being racist or uneducated when I say that it pays to look at the whole picture. For instance, the videos of Alton Sterling that are circulating the internet don't really give a clear picture who was in the right or who was in the wrong. There are conflicting accounts as to if he was holding a gun or not. My point is that we shouldn't rush to conclusions and assume police brutality because the man shot was black and the man who shot him wore blue.
Now, should we be outraged when it is indeed police brutality and/or when unnecessary force is used, YES! This doesn't mean, however, we as Americans/African Americans/black people should start yelling at the cops, killing them and being disrespectful. Both sides need to be able to respect the other before assuming things based on skin color or uniform. Just like not every black person is the same, not every cop is the same.
No matter who dies via gun shot(s) makes me sad. However, not all shootings are unjust. If the perpetrator is holding a gun or something that looks like a gun, I'm not surprised when the cop or other person takes a shot. Running away or taking your sweet old time putting your hands above your head isn't exactly telling the police that you are innocent. The more idiots that do these things or try to get away with breaking the law, the more likely police are going to go into altercations with our race ready to use deadly force. The more idiots in blue that kick black Americans or shoot those who are on the ground, we will view cops as people to fight.
This video makes me so sad because it's people like this who try to taunt and make everything the policeman's fault. They think every policeman is like the idiots who have been proven to be corrupt and racist. Not every cop is like that!
Just remember 9 times our of 10, we don't know the whole story. Who's to blame for that? The media. Not African Americans. Not cops. Let's unite against the real enemy here in this instance.
Monday, May 23, 2016
Cops vs. the Public
In the Blue Bloods episode, Blowback, the PC makes this comment at the weekly Sunday dinner table, "Somewhere along the line, the trust between cops and the public broke down. But until both sides take steps to restore that trust, neither side is going to be safe."
The whole episode saddened me because of the truth behind not only his words, but also the use of force used by police and the reactions of the public toward them. Even though I didn't grow up in a violent neighborhood, I still feel the anger when a cop shoots what seems to be an unarmed perpetrator. Many times we never know the truth because the truth died with the person who fell onto the pavement. Sometimes we see what we want to see, instead of the whole picture.
In the incident with Perez, while he did have his hands up, a knife was still in his hand after being told to put it down several times. Not only that, but he walked towards the officer who had the gun out. While I think that killing the guy might have been excessive, in the moment there's no telling whether or not if I were in the officer's position that I would have had time to lower my gun in order to hit the perpetrator in the knee or somewhere else non-fatal. There's also no telling that the guy with the knife wouldn't have suddenly lunged at me. So, shooting the guy just might have been the best answer before finding out what could have happened if waited.
There's always more than one side to a story. I don't like the fact that we are distancing ourselves from cops. The way I was raised was to respect the office, the badge and the authority that these cops have. So when I hear the news about a cop shooting, I don't automatically get mad at either side. I research to see if I can find the whole story. Unfortunately, every news source has an agenda and it isn't always fair. We all know we can't trust the media on anything, so why base an opinion on them?
Side note: When you run from a cop, what do you expect to happen? If you're innocent, stay where you are. If you're not, then yeah I wouldn't stick around. Nothing good ever comes from running from cops. Ever! So why do it?
In conclusion, I wish I had a solution for this broken trust. It used to be that parents told their kids if you're ever in trouble, look for a cop. Now it's stay away from them. I do see that there are some cops that are corrupt and have their own agendas. Some of them see all blacks as a person of interest and treat them as such even before asking them, "Where were you between 10pm and 1am?" However, I don't believe we should mistrust all of them based on those idiots. Same as not seeing all people with dark skin as people to look out for. It's not fair either way. The hashtags #blacklivesmatter and #backtheblue don't help matters. We should just all stand behind #alllivesmatter and not be one or the other.
The trust indeed is broken and it's up to all of us cops and public alike to mend it. If we don't, like Frank Reagan the PC said, "...neither side is safe."
The whole episode saddened me because of the truth behind not only his words, but also the use of force used by police and the reactions of the public toward them. Even though I didn't grow up in a violent neighborhood, I still feel the anger when a cop shoots what seems to be an unarmed perpetrator. Many times we never know the truth because the truth died with the person who fell onto the pavement. Sometimes we see what we want to see, instead of the whole picture.
In the incident with Perez, while he did have his hands up, a knife was still in his hand after being told to put it down several times. Not only that, but he walked towards the officer who had the gun out. While I think that killing the guy might have been excessive, in the moment there's no telling whether or not if I were in the officer's position that I would have had time to lower my gun in order to hit the perpetrator in the knee or somewhere else non-fatal. There's also no telling that the guy with the knife wouldn't have suddenly lunged at me. So, shooting the guy just might have been the best answer before finding out what could have happened if waited.
There's always more than one side to a story. I don't like the fact that we are distancing ourselves from cops. The way I was raised was to respect the office, the badge and the authority that these cops have. So when I hear the news about a cop shooting, I don't automatically get mad at either side. I research to see if I can find the whole story. Unfortunately, every news source has an agenda and it isn't always fair. We all know we can't trust the media on anything, so why base an opinion on them?
Side note: When you run from a cop, what do you expect to happen? If you're innocent, stay where you are. If you're not, then yeah I wouldn't stick around. Nothing good ever comes from running from cops. Ever! So why do it?
In conclusion, I wish I had a solution for this broken trust. It used to be that parents told their kids if you're ever in trouble, look for a cop. Now it's stay away from them. I do see that there are some cops that are corrupt and have their own agendas. Some of them see all blacks as a person of interest and treat them as such even before asking them, "Where were you between 10pm and 1am?" However, I don't believe we should mistrust all of them based on those idiots. Same as not seeing all people with dark skin as people to look out for. It's not fair either way. The hashtags #blacklivesmatter and #backtheblue don't help matters. We should just all stand behind #alllivesmatter and not be one or the other.
The trust indeed is broken and it's up to all of us cops and public alike to mend it. If we don't, like Frank Reagan the PC said, "...neither side is safe."
Wednesday, April 20, 2016
Supergirl FINALE
Like all finales, Supergirl ended with a thousand questions. Of course, that's exactly what the producers want. As a writer, I do love writing cliffhangers and filling my readers with suspense, but as a viewer/reader....not so much. Especially when it's the end of the book or season and you have to WAIT for what seems like an eternity to find out what comes next.
Aside from that, in this episode J'onn J'onzz tells Lucy that her father is only trying to do what it best. The scene is when General Lane wants to keep the Martian in handcuffs even though in the previous episode he helped save National City. Lucy felt that that wasn't right, as do I. How Lucy stood up to her dad about his choices made me smile. Sometimes it can be hard to stand our ground as adults especially when our parents feel differently about a decision.
When we are young, parents have a right to say no and we should obey them lest there be consequences later. As we grow older and we find our place in this world, while we should listen to our parents' advice we also must be able to stand on our own two feet. Sometimes that means we must do what we feel is right despite our parents choice.
All of this reminded me about how I feel about my parent's choices in how they raised me and the school system they put me through. I can honestly say in their own world regardless of how I felt or difficult circumstances I went through, they thought they were doing what was best. I wish things were different. There are people I wished I had never met and pain I never experienced, but the past is the past and there's nothing I can do about it except move on.
Most of this episode is about ending Myriad once and for all by giving the people of Earth hope that they can overcome this. We each need to have hope that whatever pain we are experiencing, we will get through it. I'm reminded of the song by Chris Tomlin, We Will Rise. Whether you believe in God the Father or not, there's more to life than what you see and those around you, especially family, are important. Hope keeps us from utter despair. Hope drives our hopelessness, which is exactly what happened to the people of National City and will happen to us.
I hope you've enjoyed this show as much as I have. If you haven't watched it, all episodes are available on cbs.com. Can't wait till season 2!
Aside from that, in this episode J'onn J'onzz tells Lucy that her father is only trying to do what it best. The scene is when General Lane wants to keep the Martian in handcuffs even though in the previous episode he helped save National City. Lucy felt that that wasn't right, as do I. How Lucy stood up to her dad about his choices made me smile. Sometimes it can be hard to stand our ground as adults especially when our parents feel differently about a decision.
When we are young, parents have a right to say no and we should obey them lest there be consequences later. As we grow older and we find our place in this world, while we should listen to our parents' advice we also must be able to stand on our own two feet. Sometimes that means we must do what we feel is right despite our parents choice.
All of this reminded me about how I feel about my parent's choices in how they raised me and the school system they put me through. I can honestly say in their own world regardless of how I felt or difficult circumstances I went through, they thought they were doing what was best. I wish things were different. There are people I wished I had never met and pain I never experienced, but the past is the past and there's nothing I can do about it except move on.
Most of this episode is about ending Myriad once and for all by giving the people of Earth hope that they can overcome this. We each need to have hope that whatever pain we are experiencing, we will get through it. I'm reminded of the song by Chris Tomlin, We Will Rise. Whether you believe in God the Father or not, there's more to life than what you see and those around you, especially family, are important. Hope keeps us from utter despair. Hope drives our hopelessness, which is exactly what happened to the people of National City and will happen to us.
I hope you've enjoyed this show as much as I have. If you haven't watched it, all episodes are available on cbs.com. Can't wait till season 2!
Wednesday, April 13, 2016
Hope > Fear
Cat Grant should run for president. I'm dead serious, she's a much better candidate than the ones in the 2016 election. Aside from my opinion on this, last night on Supergirl, Cat Grant said some profound words I hope I will always remember and take heed.
"We can't let fear drive our actions."
There are quite a few things I could name that I'm afraid of. One at the top of the list are bees. Followed by pitch darkness, empty houses and the future. My career is important to me and I don't ever want to give up on my dreams whether professional or personal. Sometimes fear cripples me to the point of not going after something I want. When I submit a story I feel proud of and/or shows raw emotion, I get that sick feeling in my stomach. I toss and turn over whether or not I should send that piece in. I end up doing it every time because I know that if published, I will be one step closer to my goal.
Fear is a common enemy we all have to fight everyday and no matter what, we can't let it clobber us. We have to push past the things we are afraid of and think positive.
If your attempt fails, try again. Don't let it stop you from trying.
:D
"Hope is stronger than fear." - Supergirl
"We can't let fear drive our actions."
There are quite a few things I could name that I'm afraid of. One at the top of the list are bees. Followed by pitch darkness, empty houses and the future. My career is important to me and I don't ever want to give up on my dreams whether professional or personal. Sometimes fear cripples me to the point of not going after something I want. When I submit a story I feel proud of and/or shows raw emotion, I get that sick feeling in my stomach. I toss and turn over whether or not I should send that piece in. I end up doing it every time because I know that if published, I will be one step closer to my goal.
Fear is a common enemy we all have to fight everyday and no matter what, we can't let it clobber us. We have to push past the things we are afraid of and think positive.
If your attempt fails, try again. Don't let it stop you from trying.
:D
"Hope is stronger than fear." - Supergirl
Tuesday, April 5, 2016
Action
I was watching a show called, Rosewood, last week and came across this piece of gold.
"A simple act can have the ramifications beyond one's comprehension."
This brought all sorts of memories, some good and some bad. For instance, when I decided to learn American Sign Language it bought so many opportunities I never knew existed. I made new friends and gained mentors I hope will always be in my life. At Ithaca College, I was able to become the Director of a sign language choir. Afterwards, I worked with an entrepreneur who's Deaf and needed someone who could help with her business's website and tutor a family. I also have had chances to sign songs with individuals at church. I love how my decision to learn this unique language has changed my life for the better in ways I can't describe.
On the flip side, making a judgment call that ended up being futile is something I wish I could go back and change. There was a time when I tried to have an intervention with a good friend of mine and unfortunately, I had trouble keeping calm. She and I don't talk like we used to and our friendship is slim to none at this point. I never knew we'd be at this point, not speaking. I remember the good times and the days when I could lean on her for support. Even if God grants me a chance for a do-over, I don't know if anything will have truly changed because I feel that she needed to hear what I said.
In both instances, a simple act did more than I imagined. We will always have regrets and many of us say we want to live a life without that but as a human being it's inevitable that we will make mistakes. The key is to grow from them and NOT repeat them.
Since my last attempt at a serious conversation/intervention with a friend I've been able to get a handle on my emotions, but often at the cost of my not being able to fully express what I feel I need. It's a work in progress like most things in life.
"A simple act can have the ramifications beyond one's comprehension."
This brought all sorts of memories, some good and some bad. For instance, when I decided to learn American Sign Language it bought so many opportunities I never knew existed. I made new friends and gained mentors I hope will always be in my life. At Ithaca College, I was able to become the Director of a sign language choir. Afterwards, I worked with an entrepreneur who's Deaf and needed someone who could help with her business's website and tutor a family. I also have had chances to sign songs with individuals at church. I love how my decision to learn this unique language has changed my life for the better in ways I can't describe.
On the flip side, making a judgment call that ended up being futile is something I wish I could go back and change. There was a time when I tried to have an intervention with a good friend of mine and unfortunately, I had trouble keeping calm. She and I don't talk like we used to and our friendship is slim to none at this point. I never knew we'd be at this point, not speaking. I remember the good times and the days when I could lean on her for support. Even if God grants me a chance for a do-over, I don't know if anything will have truly changed because I feel that she needed to hear what I said.
In both instances, a simple act did more than I imagined. We will always have regrets and many of us say we want to live a life without that but as a human being it's inevitable that we will make mistakes. The key is to grow from them and NOT repeat them.
Since my last attempt at a serious conversation/intervention with a friend I've been able to get a handle on my emotions, but often at the cost of my not being able to fully express what I feel I need. It's a work in progress like most things in life.
Saturday, March 26, 2016
Goal Driven
Have I mentioned how much I love this new show Supergirl? It's clean AND uplifting and filled with little gold mines of encouragement and lessons. Kind of reminds me of how The Cosby Show makes me feel. Instead of feeling disgusted or annoyed like many 21st century TV shows, I smile and genuinely laugh.
Which leads me to this nugget I found that Winn said to Siobhan when she was feeling mad at Kara for her end of employment at Catco Media. "Once you have a goal, no one is going to stop you from getting it." He also mentioned that powerful people have setbacks and that what all this is. It's not the end of the world, but rather a way to reflect and change course.
This conversation made me think about my own life. I have many personal and professional goals. One of which includes writing a NY Times Bestseller. I would love nothing more than to be in the ranks with my fellow favorite authors. Creating stories has always been a passion and I can't think of anything else that makes me happier. It's because of how I feel, that I refuse to give up. No matter how many times people tell me I'm not good enough for them to take a chance on me. Writers, artists, singers are probably the ones who get the highest number of rejections. The ones who go far and achieve their dreams are the ones who never give up. I want to be one of them.
Later, Kara says in her interview with Cat Grant, "I just want to be useful. To somebody. I want to be worthwhile." I've felt like that every time I send in a resume or write a synopsis to a publishing company. Sometimes I feel like God has shown me my purpose in life and then one bad call after another happens and I'm left feeling lost again. I feel so sure I know my place in this world. Every person on this planet, I believe, was given an invisible road map, but it only becomes visible if you trust God with the future. While we'd rather he'd show us the destination, we have to be patient (grrr, I know) in order to figure out which way to go.
However, side note, do not do what Siobhan attempted later in the episode. Going after what you want should include dignity and respect for those around and above you.
Which leads me to this nugget I found that Winn said to Siobhan when she was feeling mad at Kara for her end of employment at Catco Media. "Once you have a goal, no one is going to stop you from getting it." He also mentioned that powerful people have setbacks and that what all this is. It's not the end of the world, but rather a way to reflect and change course.
This conversation made me think about my own life. I have many personal and professional goals. One of which includes writing a NY Times Bestseller. I would love nothing more than to be in the ranks with my fellow favorite authors. Creating stories has always been a passion and I can't think of anything else that makes me happier. It's because of how I feel, that I refuse to give up. No matter how many times people tell me I'm not good enough for them to take a chance on me. Writers, artists, singers are probably the ones who get the highest number of rejections. The ones who go far and achieve their dreams are the ones who never give up. I want to be one of them.
Later, Kara says in her interview with Cat Grant, "I just want to be useful. To somebody. I want to be worthwhile." I've felt like that every time I send in a resume or write a synopsis to a publishing company. Sometimes I feel like God has shown me my purpose in life and then one bad call after another happens and I'm left feeling lost again. I feel so sure I know my place in this world. Every person on this planet, I believe, was given an invisible road map, but it only becomes visible if you trust God with the future. While we'd rather he'd show us the destination, we have to be patient (grrr, I know) in order to figure out which way to go.
However, side note, do not do what Siobhan attempted later in the episode. Going after what you want should include dignity and respect for those around and above you.
Thursday, March 17, 2016
More Than One Side
In this week's episode of Supergirl, a version of Kryptonite changed her demeanor to the point where she hurt others both strangers and those close to her with actions and harsh words. While her new outward personality held some truth, it wasn't right to bring others down.
This got me thinking as to how often we suppress our feelings in order to make someone else happy. In the movie 27 Dresses, Jane kept saying "Yes" to planning other people's weddings and rehearsal dinners, even if it meant up-heaving her own life. Sometimes we should say "No" or say what's truly on our minds but sometimes, it's better to just keep the peace. The hard part is figuring out the difference.
Another truth that came to mind during this episode is the fact that we have different sides to us. There are times when our not so good side comes out. It's human and I'll always appreciate the fact that the friends I still have continue to love me despite those times. Stress eats us up or fear tears us down. It's those who never stop believing in us or stop being in our lives that makes all the difference. Supergirl has that support system, which helped her get back to her normal self.
I felt that it was truly unfair for Cat to tell the world that Supergirl couldn't be trusted. On one hand I can understand that because she's National City's hero and the public needed to know she's unstable, but at the same time I felt that the message she sent on TV was a bit harsh. Everyone has bad days as Cat pointed out, but as a hero Supergirl has to be on her "A" game all the time. In our reality, we treat our presidents and official leaders this way. They are supposed to be perfect, be all knowing and help everyone see justice, yet they are still human. Sometimes they fail. Sometimes they say things they shouldn't. Should that be a reason why we discredit them? Should that be a reason for pushing for impeachment? No. I've been in a position of leadership and there are moments I wish I could go back and re-word a sentence or speak up instead of being silent. It's hard to be in charge. It comes with so much pressure. I wish everyone could understand/acknowledge that and be more mindful of who we are inside. A person who will make mistakes.
Supergirl has done a lot to the help the people of National City and I hope she will be able to win back their trust as the show goes on. I absolutely love the fact that Cat is again on her side.
This got me thinking as to how often we suppress our feelings in order to make someone else happy. In the movie 27 Dresses, Jane kept saying "Yes" to planning other people's weddings and rehearsal dinners, even if it meant up-heaving her own life. Sometimes we should say "No" or say what's truly on our minds but sometimes, it's better to just keep the peace. The hard part is figuring out the difference.
Another truth that came to mind during this episode is the fact that we have different sides to us. There are times when our not so good side comes out. It's human and I'll always appreciate the fact that the friends I still have continue to love me despite those times. Stress eats us up or fear tears us down. It's those who never stop believing in us or stop being in our lives that makes all the difference. Supergirl has that support system, which helped her get back to her normal self.
I felt that it was truly unfair for Cat to tell the world that Supergirl couldn't be trusted. On one hand I can understand that because she's National City's hero and the public needed to know she's unstable, but at the same time I felt that the message she sent on TV was a bit harsh. Everyone has bad days as Cat pointed out, but as a hero Supergirl has to be on her "A" game all the time. In our reality, we treat our presidents and official leaders this way. They are supposed to be perfect, be all knowing and help everyone see justice, yet they are still human. Sometimes they fail. Sometimes they say things they shouldn't. Should that be a reason why we discredit them? Should that be a reason for pushing for impeachment? No. I've been in a position of leadership and there are moments I wish I could go back and re-word a sentence or speak up instead of being silent. It's hard to be in charge. It comes with so much pressure. I wish everyone could understand/acknowledge that and be more mindful of who we are inside. A person who will make mistakes.
Supergirl has done a lot to the help the people of National City and I hope she will be able to win back their trust as the show goes on. I absolutely love the fact that Cat is again on her side.
Wednesday, March 2, 2016
People Want to Care
In this week's Supergirl episode Siobhan, the new assistant to Cat, shares a story about her father cheating on her mother. Unfortunately, she saw him being unfaithful with his assistant one day. He said he was sorry but he really wasn't for he didn't stop hurting his daughter.
The previous episode revealed her as a mean girl from the start. This conversation she had with Winn told us that there was more to her than what she chose to expose. It got me thinking about those I know who have chosen to hide behind a mask. Most of them were in high school and I never became friends with them because I didn't want to be around their toxicity. Who knows why they were mean to everyone or behaved the way they did. Maybe they had a harsh childhood. Maybe their parents were mean to them. Regardless of the reason behind their masks, there is no right reason to be mean to others. However, if we all gave people the benefit of the doubt first rather than ignoring them, maybe things would be different.
Looking at myself growing up, I tried to hide who I truly was because I was tired of being rejected. I always wanted to be someone else instead of who I was created to be. I walked around hiding who I really was and my opinions because I thought no one cared to know the real me. The people who truly did, pre-college especially, are the ones I will never forget. It was while in college that I realized that being different isn't a bad thing and having a sad past doesn't define me. Letting people in and letting them care was hard, but worth it. Now, I have people I can count on and share my true feelings with and I wouldn't trade those relationships for a billion dollars.
By the end of the episode, Winn shares his story and surprisingly Siobhan kisses him. Did she really understand what he was trying to tell her about people wanting to care if she let them....who knows. The point is that Winn tried to show that truth to her. Not everyone is out there to break hearts and create havoc. We were created to crave human interaction and love. We need that to survive.
<3 in="" let="" p="" people="">
The previous episode revealed her as a mean girl from the start. This conversation she had with Winn told us that there was more to her than what she chose to expose. It got me thinking about those I know who have chosen to hide behind a mask. Most of them were in high school and I never became friends with them because I didn't want to be around their toxicity. Who knows why they were mean to everyone or behaved the way they did. Maybe they had a harsh childhood. Maybe their parents were mean to them. Regardless of the reason behind their masks, there is no right reason to be mean to others. However, if we all gave people the benefit of the doubt first rather than ignoring them, maybe things would be different.
Looking at myself growing up, I tried to hide who I truly was because I was tired of being rejected. I always wanted to be someone else instead of who I was created to be. I walked around hiding who I really was and my opinions because I thought no one cared to know the real me. The people who truly did, pre-college especially, are the ones I will never forget. It was while in college that I realized that being different isn't a bad thing and having a sad past doesn't define me. Letting people in and letting them care was hard, but worth it. Now, I have people I can count on and share my true feelings with and I wouldn't trade those relationships for a billion dollars.
By the end of the episode, Winn shares his story and surprisingly Siobhan kisses him. Did she really understand what he was trying to tell her about people wanting to care if she let them....who knows. The point is that Winn tried to show that truth to her. Not everyone is out there to break hearts and create havoc. We were created to crave human interaction and love. We need that to survive.
<3 in="" let="" p="" people="">
Wednesday, February 24, 2016
Be Better Than Your Enemy
This week's Supergirl episode was about her being forced to realize that her idea of justice wasn't right. Even though she is not human, she had to do what's right for a human prisoner. Maxwell Lord, I think we can all agree, is a horrible excuse for a human being. He has no concept of right vs wrong and no shame. He could care less about another person's life and feelings. He lies, steals and kills without a second thought. He has even tried to kill Supergirl on occasion. However, regardless of how he treats others he, deserves the same treatment of justice as anyone else who has done wrong.
Now, most of us aren't a part of the judicial or supreme court system on a daily basis, but the same principles apply. The bullies I've encountered over the years probably deserve the same pain I experienced. However, it is not my place to give it. In order to be better than my enemies, I have to rise above my anger and the hurt I feel. I can't let them win by going down to their level. Instead, I remove myself from them and focus on overcoming my fears, insecurities and helplessness. I don't have to be friends with them and trust me, it's not something I'm striving for. At the same time, I should respect the fact that they are human.
Being better than your enemy is difficult. Supergirl found it hard too. After realizing that she wasn't much better than Maxwell Lord by imprisoning him without trial never-mind kidnapping him, she let him go. She hopes, as do I, that he won't continue to plan her demise or tell the world who she really is. Letting him go was the right thing to do and we shall see if he repays her with kindness or tries to overpower her, yet again.
Now, most of us aren't a part of the judicial or supreme court system on a daily basis, but the same principles apply. The bullies I've encountered over the years probably deserve the same pain I experienced. However, it is not my place to give it. In order to be better than my enemies, I have to rise above my anger and the hurt I feel. I can't let them win by going down to their level. Instead, I remove myself from them and focus on overcoming my fears, insecurities and helplessness. I don't have to be friends with them and trust me, it's not something I'm striving for. At the same time, I should respect the fact that they are human.
Being better than your enemy is difficult. Supergirl found it hard too. After realizing that she wasn't much better than Maxwell Lord by imprisoning him without trial never-mind kidnapping him, she let him go. She hopes, as do I, that he won't continue to plan her demise or tell the world who she really is. Letting him go was the right thing to do and we shall see if he repays her with kindness or tries to overpower her, yet again.
Wednesday, February 3, 2016
Respect vs. Trust
Recently, I had a discussion on LinkedIn about respect and whether it not is should be earned or given. In light of the elections coming up and the individual candidates, I've found it appalling that people abuse the "I have a right to share my opinion" so negatively. Not only on social media, but also face to face we mock and tear down with thoughtless words towards people we don't like. I feel that that is showing disrespect. The criteria for respect shouldn't be based on whether you agree with what's been said, but rather because they are a human being.
I deserve respect just as much as a doctor, our president or your neighbor. Personally, I feel that when someone is in a position of authority or has gone to school studying a subject I don't know much about, I should respect them because of their knowledge. They don't have to earn respect for me to give it. I may not agree with everything that President Obama has done. I may not like some of my professors in college. I may not understand why my parents forced me to stay at a school they knew I hated. However, because they are in a place of authority, they should have respect. If you can't find it in your heart to respect the person, at the very least, respect the position. We 20 somethings don't understand the stress of what being a country leader brings. We don't understand what it takes to be in charge of a college campus. We have no idea what it's like to raise a teenager much less counsel someone our own age. There's a lot we don't know.
Trust on the other hand should be earned. If I handed out trust like I handed out respect, my soul and spirit would have been beaten severely; more so that it has already been. If I totaled my dad's car, I don't expect him to just hand me the keys to his new one. If a friend kissed my boyfriend, I'm not going to suggest we go bowling together. However, I would respect them as a person, meaning I'm going to do my best to treat them like a human being. I won't draw up caricatures and put them in the newspaper. If we trusted everyone with a bight smile, we would be in big trouble because there are shady individuals out there who have no regard for your feelings.
Trust is precious and should be taken seriously. In terms of friendships, because of the people that have betrayed me, I am very cautious to whom I give my trust. I have criteria that must be passed before I share anything close to my heart. I purposely make it difficult to be my friend, let alone my best friend. You want to be careful with this because if you trust the wrong people, you're not the only one getting hurt. Those around you may too.
In closing, respect seems to have been a lost act/emotion. Constantly, I'm seeing social media posts that criticize presidential candidates for everything under the sun. People rant and rave, poke fun of and basically borderline bully not only those who help run our country, but those who hold onto principles that many deem stupid or old-fashioned. People scream for acceptance/equal rights, yet many still try to make those whose ideas are different or not "widely accepted" feel uncomfortable or threatened. If you really want "open mindedness" maybe we all should be towards EVERY opinion and point of view out there including the ones that are based on belief.
If we can respect the pouch (Capri Sun), we can respect each other no matter what office we hold or what belief system we are a part of.
I deserve respect just as much as a doctor, our president or your neighbor. Personally, I feel that when someone is in a position of authority or has gone to school studying a subject I don't know much about, I should respect them because of their knowledge. They don't have to earn respect for me to give it. I may not agree with everything that President Obama has done. I may not like some of my professors in college. I may not understand why my parents forced me to stay at a school they knew I hated. However, because they are in a place of authority, they should have respect. If you can't find it in your heart to respect the person, at the very least, respect the position. We 20 somethings don't understand the stress of what being a country leader brings. We don't understand what it takes to be in charge of a college campus. We have no idea what it's like to raise a teenager much less counsel someone our own age. There's a lot we don't know.
Trust on the other hand should be earned. If I handed out trust like I handed out respect, my soul and spirit would have been beaten severely; more so that it has already been. If I totaled my dad's car, I don't expect him to just hand me the keys to his new one. If a friend kissed my boyfriend, I'm not going to suggest we go bowling together. However, I would respect them as a person, meaning I'm going to do my best to treat them like a human being. I won't draw up caricatures and put them in the newspaper. If we trusted everyone with a bight smile, we would be in big trouble because there are shady individuals out there who have no regard for your feelings.
Trust is precious and should be taken seriously. In terms of friendships, because of the people that have betrayed me, I am very cautious to whom I give my trust. I have criteria that must be passed before I share anything close to my heart. I purposely make it difficult to be my friend, let alone my best friend. You want to be careful with this because if you trust the wrong people, you're not the only one getting hurt. Those around you may too.
In closing, respect seems to have been a lost act/emotion. Constantly, I'm seeing social media posts that criticize presidential candidates for everything under the sun. People rant and rave, poke fun of and basically borderline bully not only those who help run our country, but those who hold onto principles that many deem stupid or old-fashioned. People scream for acceptance/equal rights, yet many still try to make those whose ideas are different or not "widely accepted" feel uncomfortable or threatened. If you really want "open mindedness" maybe we all should be towards EVERY opinion and point of view out there including the ones that are based on belief.
If we can respect the pouch (Capri Sun), we can respect each other no matter what office we hold or what belief system we are a part of.
Tuesday, January 26, 2016
Family Is Always Worth It
On last night's episode of Supergirl, at the beginning of the episode Ms. Grant told Kara "I will make your life hell." "It's worth it. Family always is," was her answer. This conversation got me thinking about issues in general that have happened between my parents and I or my sister and I. The most recent one being a huge disagreement about a life changing decision. Even though I've walked away angry, yelled at her or seriously felt like hitting her, she's still my sister and forever will be. I want her to be happy, but not at the expense of ruining her life.
Whether it's swallowing pride, apologizing like Cat Grant had to do with her son Adam or letting someone you care about face the consequences and pray they find their way back, having a real relationship with family is important. I never want to tell someone that I haven't spoken to my father in five years. Never. There are days where I feel like distancing myself but I always find myself missing their sense of humor or ability to erase tears. Family is something one should fight for and always put before others.
So in conclusion, I agree that family is worth every effort to keep the peace because friends come and go and relationships go south, but you will always have family to count on. I hope everyone has or will have that confidence. I realize we don't live in a perfect world and adults do stupid things, but if you do have family whether they are in the same town or not, do your best to keep on loving them and doing whatever it takes to keep you all together.
Whether it's swallowing pride, apologizing like Cat Grant had to do with her son Adam or letting someone you care about face the consequences and pray they find their way back, having a real relationship with family is important. I never want to tell someone that I haven't spoken to my father in five years. Never. There are days where I feel like distancing myself but I always find myself missing their sense of humor or ability to erase tears. Family is something one should fight for and always put before others.
So in conclusion, I agree that family is worth every effort to keep the peace because friends come and go and relationships go south, but you will always have family to count on. I hope everyone has or will have that confidence. I realize we don't live in a perfect world and adults do stupid things, but if you do have family whether they are in the same town or not, do your best to keep on loving them and doing whatever it takes to keep you all together.
Friday, January 22, 2016
Modesty Shouldn't Be A Problem
I was scrolling through Facebook this morning and found this article. My first reaction was "WHAT IN THE WORLD IS WRONG WITH THIS WORLD?!?!"
In my family growing up, modesty has always been something to strive for. Never a bad thing, but instead away to help others perceive us in a positive light. Now, I do see the author's point in not telling someone they are a "slut" since that word isn't nice to say regardless of what we think. The same is true in saying that something someone is wearing is "boring" just because it's doesn't show enough. There's nothing wrong with wanting to be modest. If anything, it shows the world a different way to live ( in my opinion, better).
We live in a society that says that no one is wrong and everyone should be able to live the way they should. Why does it seem to only work for those who are following the majority opinion? The ones whose mindset is like most of America or the world? When someone decides to do something different, all of a sudden it's wrong? There are many instances I see this happening, whether it's an opinion on a social issue or the choice not to have sex on the first date. No one be ashamed of wearing clothes that aren't skin tight nor for being pro-life.
At the end of this article, the author mentions that we should talk about what we wear more and I agree. I've come to realize the more we don't talk, the more we tend to generalize and assume. If someone never gets the courage to talk to someone who is from a different country such as Thailand or maybe Greece, that person will never truly learn outside of the classroom. One of things I love about dating men from other countries is how my world gets bigger by hearing their stories. Sometimes they are sad, but many times they are enlightening and leave me wanting to know more. We should definitely discuss why we wear what we wear. Many Muslims wear a piece of their culture in America because that's their identity and part of life. If I don't want to show my breasts to the world, I have the right to that. Personally, I believe they shouldn't be shown to the world, but everyone has a right to do what they want to do. End of story.
In my family growing up, modesty has always been something to strive for. Never a bad thing, but instead away to help others perceive us in a positive light. Now, I do see the author's point in not telling someone they are a "slut" since that word isn't nice to say regardless of what we think. The same is true in saying that something someone is wearing is "boring" just because it's doesn't show enough. There's nothing wrong with wanting to be modest. If anything, it shows the world a different way to live ( in my opinion, better).
We live in a society that says that no one is wrong and everyone should be able to live the way they should. Why does it seem to only work for those who are following the majority opinion? The ones whose mindset is like most of America or the world? When someone decides to do something different, all of a sudden it's wrong? There are many instances I see this happening, whether it's an opinion on a social issue or the choice not to have sex on the first date. No one be ashamed of wearing clothes that aren't skin tight nor for being pro-life.
At the end of this article, the author mentions that we should talk about what we wear more and I agree. I've come to realize the more we don't talk, the more we tend to generalize and assume. If someone never gets the courage to talk to someone who is from a different country such as Thailand or maybe Greece, that person will never truly learn outside of the classroom. One of things I love about dating men from other countries is how my world gets bigger by hearing their stories. Sometimes they are sad, but many times they are enlightening and leave me wanting to know more. We should definitely discuss why we wear what we wear. Many Muslims wear a piece of their culture in America because that's their identity and part of life. If I don't want to show my breasts to the world, I have the right to that. Personally, I believe they shouldn't be shown to the world, but everyone has a right to do what they want to do. End of story.
Tuesday, January 19, 2016
Bottling Things Up
In last night's episode of Supergirl, Winn's dad breaks out of jail in order to have him kill his enemy/former boss all because the man had stolen his toy designs. The reason that his dad was in jail in the first place was because he had sent a teddy bear with a bomb inside to his office. Unfortunately, instead of it reaching the boss, the assistant had opened the package which resulting in her death and five others. Now 15 years later, instead of admitting that it was his own fault that he was sent to jail, he blames the boss for missing out on his son's life. It wasn't the boss's fault that he missed out on being a father, it was his own fault unfortunately, he had failed to put things in proper perspective.
We as humans tend to blame everyone but the right person when we get into trouble. When a policeman arrests someone, very often the friends and family scream at the policeman saying something along the lines of, "Why are you doing this to my son!?" This the yelling should be turned towards the person who committed the crime, "What did you do to deserve this punishment?"
The topic I really want to discuss today is how we bottle things up. Winn, towards the end of the episode, says "I don't want to keep things bottled up because then I might explode." I paused for a second to reflect on my own life. How often did I keep things to myself instead of standing up? How many times have I wanted to tell someone how I really felt, but instead kept quiet out of fear? Winn kissed Kara because he has liked her for years but was afraid. He didn't want to do that anymore. Sadly, Kara and Winn's friendship is now in jeopardy unless both of them acknowledge their feelings and move forward together. I would hate to see them "break up" and not be friends anymore.
Growing up, I bottled things up a lot. There were people I wanted to punch in the face, but didn't have the courage. There were times when I wanted to cry, but pushed it down. Granted, I'd probably would have gotten suspended a lot if I had given in to most of my feelings back then. At the same time, maybe it wouldn't have taken me so long to let go of the anger I had towards some individuals who bullied me.
In conclusion, my take away from this episode is to face my fears as well as let others know how I feel about what they've said or done to me sooner rather than later. I've slowly gotten better at it, though it still scares the heck out of me every time; however I'm not giving up.
We as humans tend to blame everyone but the right person when we get into trouble. When a policeman arrests someone, very often the friends and family scream at the policeman saying something along the lines of, "Why are you doing this to my son!?" This the yelling should be turned towards the person who committed the crime, "What did you do to deserve this punishment?"
The topic I really want to discuss today is how we bottle things up. Winn, towards the end of the episode, says "I don't want to keep things bottled up because then I might explode." I paused for a second to reflect on my own life. How often did I keep things to myself instead of standing up? How many times have I wanted to tell someone how I really felt, but instead kept quiet out of fear? Winn kissed Kara because he has liked her for years but was afraid. He didn't want to do that anymore. Sadly, Kara and Winn's friendship is now in jeopardy unless both of them acknowledge their feelings and move forward together. I would hate to see them "break up" and not be friends anymore.
Growing up, I bottled things up a lot. There were people I wanted to punch in the face, but didn't have the courage. There were times when I wanted to cry, but pushed it down. Granted, I'd probably would have gotten suspended a lot if I had given in to most of my feelings back then. At the same time, maybe it wouldn't have taken me so long to let go of the anger I had towards some individuals who bullied me.
In conclusion, my take away from this episode is to face my fears as well as let others know how I feel about what they've said or done to me sooner rather than later. I've slowly gotten better at it, though it still scares the heck out of me every time; however I'm not giving up.
Tuesday, January 12, 2016
Just Because Your Choices Are Different Doesn't Mean They Are Wrong
"Never trust a man who doesn't drink because he's probably the self-righteous type who thinks he knows right from wrong all the time." This was spoken in a Supergirl episode a few weeks ago that I wanted to address.
Honestly, I don't understand this logic. Do you? What makes anyone think that the decision not to drink would mean that that person is self-righteous? It's like when someone gets mad about a choice to not swear. Or a choice not to have sex. It's just that, a choice. No one is telling you that you have to make the same choice. Who's forcing you to follow their lifestyle? Respect, though, should be shown.
Personally, when someone gets upset about things like this I begin to wonder if there is an underlying reason as to why. Maybe the cause for the emotion runs deep. Maybe they feel convicted. If that's the case, then maybe that person needs to think about their own choices. Are the choices you're making hurting others? Are they mean? Do they hurt you or someone else physically or emotionally?
The choices I make are to please God and gradually turn me into a better person. Following the crowd hasn't had much appeal to me for awhile now. Sure, I did things to get attention or to prove myself to be cool, but when I realized that what truly matters is how I view myself, my perspective and in turn, my choices changed.
So in conclusion, judging a person based on what they don't do is just as bad as judging someone based on what they look like or a religion they follow. We are free to make choices, you and me.
Honestly, I don't understand this logic. Do you? What makes anyone think that the decision not to drink would mean that that person is self-righteous? It's like when someone gets mad about a choice to not swear. Or a choice not to have sex. It's just that, a choice. No one is telling you that you have to make the same choice. Who's forcing you to follow their lifestyle? Respect, though, should be shown.
Personally, when someone gets upset about things like this I begin to wonder if there is an underlying reason as to why. Maybe the cause for the emotion runs deep. Maybe they feel convicted. If that's the case, then maybe that person needs to think about their own choices. Are the choices you're making hurting others? Are they mean? Do they hurt you or someone else physically or emotionally?
The choices I make are to please God and gradually turn me into a better person. Following the crowd hasn't had much appeal to me for awhile now. Sure, I did things to get attention or to prove myself to be cool, but when I realized that what truly matters is how I view myself, my perspective and in turn, my choices changed.
So in conclusion, judging a person based on what they don't do is just as bad as judging someone based on what they look like or a religion they follow. We are free to make choices, you and me.
Tuesday, January 5, 2016
Faith
When General Lane asked Supergirl, "How do you know that General Non and his army won't betray you?" Supergirl answered with, "I don't, but I have faith." What an example!
After being back-stabbed and ignored by so many growing up, I found faith to be hard to find. Honestly, I don't have faith in a lot people but a select few. Even those who I had had faith in before have broken my trust and ruined what good we had. It takes a strong person to put that behind them and open up their hearts again. People who knew my past, where I came from and what I had been through were the ones who had hurt me the most. However, the struggle remains as I find faith again. I lose it, I gain it and I lose it again. Constant battle. I'm still timid when I meet others, especially ones who make an effort to get to know me, the real me. I'm cautious and wary of others. It's not until I feel 80% comfortable that I come out of my shell, just a little. Looking back, I've improved on how I handle meeting new people though, I still hold back everything I can until it feels right.
Faith is hard to hold onto never mind find, but one must embrace it and use it daily. Without faith, you end up a hermit trapped. That is not what God intended for us. We are created with emotions that crave others. I love the friends that I have and hope to continue building relationships as well as building myself. It's when you are happy with who you are is when faith starts to grow and you are able to build others up. :D
After being back-stabbed and ignored by so many growing up, I found faith to be hard to find. Honestly, I don't have faith in a lot people but a select few. Even those who I had had faith in before have broken my trust and ruined what good we had. It takes a strong person to put that behind them and open up their hearts again. People who knew my past, where I came from and what I had been through were the ones who had hurt me the most. However, the struggle remains as I find faith again. I lose it, I gain it and I lose it again. Constant battle. I'm still timid when I meet others, especially ones who make an effort to get to know me, the real me. I'm cautious and wary of others. It's not until I feel 80% comfortable that I come out of my shell, just a little. Looking back, I've improved on how I handle meeting new people though, I still hold back everything I can until it feels right.
Faith is hard to hold onto never mind find, but one must embrace it and use it daily. Without faith, you end up a hermit trapped. That is not what God intended for us. We are created with emotions that crave others. I love the friends that I have and hope to continue building relationships as well as building myself. It's when you are happy with who you are is when faith starts to grow and you are able to build others up. :D
Friday, January 1, 2016
Another New Year Begins....What's Different This Time?
2016 is upon us and this is the time where we reflect and look within to make changes so that our future is better. To start off, 2015 had its ups and downs but I do not regret the major decisions I made such as leaving CT and moving to CO or taking the job at Aspen Camp. I loved my time there even when there were major annoyances. I had been wanting to move out on my own for quite some time, so moving away from the place I grew up to start over was definitely the right move. I feel more than ready to embark on my own and see what God has in store for me.
As much as I am grateful for what my parents have been to me and have down for me growing up, there comes a time where a child must leave. So being in CO has opened many possibilities and new friendships have been forged. I know that there will be many more.
Now as 2016 starts my desire is to find a place of work that allows me to be free to be me and help me grow in my writing. I'm still pursuing my dream of being a NY Times Bestseller and I refuse to give up on that. In 2015, I have published a short story inspired by a dear friend of mine and a research paper I co-authored with fellow Ithaca College classmates and professors.I know as I continue to write and send it to publishers I will be able to make my dream come true.
To make my 2016 better than my 2015, I want to be the friend I've always wanted, be the person I look up to and also be the one to speak my mind especially when something bothers me. For too long I've let people take an axe to my heart; no more. I will demand respect for my race, my disability and myself. Things are going to change for the better this year.
Have a Happy New Year!!!!!!!!
As much as I am grateful for what my parents have been to me and have down for me growing up, there comes a time where a child must leave. So being in CO has opened many possibilities and new friendships have been forged. I know that there will be many more.
Now as 2016 starts my desire is to find a place of work that allows me to be free to be me and help me grow in my writing. I'm still pursuing my dream of being a NY Times Bestseller and I refuse to give up on that. In 2015, I have published a short story inspired by a dear friend of mine and a research paper I co-authored with fellow Ithaca College classmates and professors.I know as I continue to write and send it to publishers I will be able to make my dream come true.
To make my 2016 better than my 2015, I want to be the friend I've always wanted, be the person I look up to and also be the one to speak my mind especially when something bothers me. For too long I've let people take an axe to my heart; no more. I will demand respect for my race, my disability and myself. Things are going to change for the better this year.
Have a Happy New Year!!!!!!!!
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