Open Mindedness and Closed Mindedness

This has been on my mind for a while now.

Once, when I was looking for a new roommate, I posted on Denver Roommates FB page and a man replied asking if I was ok with living with him and his wife. I answered him saying that I was not comfortable with that and thanked him for responding. He replied back with, "Why not?" I answered saying that this was a two bedroom/ one bathroom apartment and I didn't feel comfortable with that situation. He became a little aggressive and said, "But we aren't fake married, we really are married." Not sure why he thought this was why I said no. I replied telling him again that I'd rather live with just a female and not a married couple, fake or not. He replied with "You're just closed-minded! You won't help a young couple who needs housing!" I was shocked. I still don't understand where his aggression came from. Maybe he was stressed? I tried to be polite the whole time and I didn't use all caps in any of my responses. I replied telling him that I would be happy to help him look around to see if someplace else was a better fit. I also told him that just because I don't agree with you or am comfortable with what you want to do doesn't mean I'm closed minded, it just means I have a different opinion.

Why is it that so many people feel that when someone disagrees with them they are automatically closed-minded? If someone was stubborn to try a new idea even though it could work, is that closed-mindedness? I might say yes, but most of the time when people use the word, that's not what they mean.

Then there are people who call themselves open-minded but really they are only open-minded to things that they agree with. Personally, I feel like if you're going to call yourself open-minded, you should be able to listen to another perspective or opinion on any given topic. I'm not asking everyone to understand it because believe me that are plenty of issues I don't understand. I am however trying to listen to other points of views and asking questions about why they believe what they believe instead of dismissing them based on something I don't like or agree with. For example, that person is white so why should I listen to them? That person is Republican/Democrat so, therefore, everything they say is stupid. That person has a disability so I don't want to be around them. The list goes on. It's sad, really.

Now is there such a thing as being too open-minded? I think so. I think if we because open to anything and everything the media feeds us, we become mindless. If we believe everything a Democrat says simply because he's a Democrat -- we become mindless. If we don't do the research before any election or when someone accuses someone of rape or murder -- we become susceptible. Meaning, anything anyone throws at us, we believe without giving it much thought. In a perfect world, I wish people would take the time to get to know and listen to a person of a different race, mindset and/or ability.

Let's all listen more to each other instead of tearing each other down.