Family doesn't have to just mean your flesh and blood, it can mean a church family, neighbors, best friends or a group/club you are a part of.
I'm blessed to have so many families and I cherish each one, at least I try to. These days those outside of my birth family, they are mostly older than 30. It's nice to hang out with people your own age. Who will disagree with that?
Loved being able to hang with my HOP family last weekend! It felt so good to be with them and really catch up. Even though, we live in the 21st century, it's hard to keep up with friends when they are busy.
For my birthday last year, I was happy to be with two older friends who took me out on a boat ride then lunch. They are both over 40, but fun to be around. I'm glad I had them to hang with otherwise I'd be by myself or with my parents all day.
Finding the silver lining in situations like this is what makes me smile. Someday when I'm on my own, I hope I will continue to look for the bight side in situations.
Never give up, no matter how bleak the situation is.
Thursday, May 8, 2014
Wednesday, April 16, 2014
Sad Eyes
Lying to people I don't know very well, that's easy. Lying to people I know care about my life is extremely depressing. I don't want them to know the truth; the raw grief inside. It's killing me, but I'd rather hide it than leave it exposed.
I can laugh even though I feel like crying. I force myself to be social even when I'd rather bury myself into my pillow.
Talking about the pain doesn't lessen it; it just forces me to relive it. No matter how many times I try to explain why I am upset, it doesn't get me anywhere. No one knows what I'm feeling.
Praying doesn't seem to help either. He doesn't seem to be listening or even care. Remembering that He doesn't forsake His children, doesn't put a smile on my face. What are You doing?
Those who know me can tell I'm not myself. My eyes tell them I'm not happy, but I don't want to voice why.
Sad Eyes, go away. Be happy again.
I can laugh even though I feel like crying. I force myself to be social even when I'd rather bury myself into my pillow.
Talking about the pain doesn't lessen it; it just forces me to relive it. No matter how many times I try to explain why I am upset, it doesn't get me anywhere. No one knows what I'm feeling.
Praying doesn't seem to help either. He doesn't seem to be listening or even care. Remembering that He doesn't forsake His children, doesn't put a smile on my face. What are You doing?
Those who know me can tell I'm not myself. My eyes tell them I'm not happy, but I don't want to voice why.
Sad Eyes, go away. Be happy again.
Friday, March 28, 2014
Trust
Trust is important in every kind of relationship whether it's business or personal. When someone breaks that trust, it's very hard to get it back. My view of it all, trust is earned not given. For example, if I do something stupid and cause a friend of mine to lose trust or confidence in me, I would do everything in my power to get that back. Since I'm a writer, I tend to use that skill in order to bring people back to me. I'm a better communicator on paper than I am talking out loud. So I write letters or poem to the people I've hurt so that they may see how sorry I am for hurting them and wish to start over.
When two people become friends, they must build trust before an "official friendship" begins, right? You learn about each other's likes and dislikes and pet-peeves. You try to remember all those especially if a birthday comes up. If someone wanted to be my friend and they knew my favorite candy is Skittles then giving me a king size bag for my birthday would MAKE MY DAY! This is the beginning of love/trust/commitment in a sense. It doesn't even have to involve money. It could be just being there when the other person needs a shoulder or a listening ear. Maybe you scored concert tickets from someone who was giving them away and it happens to be a favorite band or team.
Once you begin to trust someone. Love isn't far behind and I don't mean the "I will love you until the day I die" kind. I mean the kind of love that puts the other person's feelings first and wanting to do whatever it takes to see the other smile.
A lot of people don't like the Bible because it's old and "out dated." I will agree with them up to a point. So many practical lessons can be learned from this dusty book. "4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres." I Corinthians chapter 13: 4 - 7
This is real love and real trust is just the beginning.
When I trust someone, seriously trust, I tend to hold nothing back. I love going all out on my friends' birthdays and Christmas and enjoy being there for them. Of course, when it comes to "no secrets," it's very hard to not want to hold the bad things back. Honestly, I can't wait to feel like I don't have to hide anything and to be free to love.
Trust is the rock of every relationship and it needs to be solid less it crumble. It's takes two people to build it and both need to come to agreements and be willing to work at it equally.
When two people become friends, they must build trust before an "official friendship" begins, right? You learn about each other's likes and dislikes and pet-peeves. You try to remember all those especially if a birthday comes up. If someone wanted to be my friend and they knew my favorite candy is Skittles then giving me a king size bag for my birthday would MAKE MY DAY! This is the beginning of love/trust/commitment in a sense. It doesn't even have to involve money. It could be just being there when the other person needs a shoulder or a listening ear. Maybe you scored concert tickets from someone who was giving them away and it happens to be a favorite band or team.
Once you begin to trust someone. Love isn't far behind and I don't mean the "I will love you until the day I die" kind. I mean the kind of love that puts the other person's feelings first and wanting to do whatever it takes to see the other smile.
A lot of people don't like the Bible because it's old and "out dated." I will agree with them up to a point. So many practical lessons can be learned from this dusty book. "4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres." I Corinthians chapter 13: 4 - 7
This is real love and real trust is just the beginning.
When I trust someone, seriously trust, I tend to hold nothing back. I love going all out on my friends' birthdays and Christmas and enjoy being there for them. Of course, when it comes to "no secrets," it's very hard to not want to hold the bad things back. Honestly, I can't wait to feel like I don't have to hide anything and to be free to love.
Trust is the rock of every relationship and it needs to be solid less it crumble. It's takes two people to build it and both need to come to agreements and be willing to work at it equally.
Thursday, March 13, 2014
Living where? How?
As much as I appreciate my parents for giving me a place to be after graduation, I'm getting quite tired of having to succumb to their rules and be without friends my own age I can go out with on weekends. Maybe Whitney is right, that I need to just go somewhere and invite people. Then the question is, who? How can I be an adult living under my parents' roof? I miss college because I could go places and not have to answer to someone if I come back at 3am. I love visiting my friends in NYC to get that outlet. What do I do with my free time now? Read, watch TV shows, play with my dog, you get the picture. My only friend my own age living in CT with her parents is Kym who is busier than I am right now. I have two friends who live in the next town over, but they are busy as well. How do I be proactive about this? I have friends at work sure, but do we do anything outside of work? Nope. Do I want to? Yes. Hosting a party at my parent's house doesn't sound appealing. Asking people to spend money, isn't ideal either. So what is left? I'm not happy with my life period. How can I make it better? Is there even a point to asking?
Bright side? Hmmmm.....I have to think about this. Getting some work done on my novel and writing poetry. Who knows, when I get a full time position if I will even have time or the energy.
Bright side? Hmmmm.....I have to think about this. Getting some work done on my novel and writing poetry. Who knows, when I get a full time position if I will even have time or the energy.
Sunday, March 2, 2014
Being a Leader
It's seriously difficult to be in charge of a group of people no matter how big or diverse the group is. I remember being in charge of a few groups and when things went wrong, it was hard to find a way to ease tension or find the right way to do something. Whenever I hit a wall, I like to take a walk and carefully find a way to diffuse a situation.
Recently, I've been reading the National Bestseller, "Lean In" and I'm loving it. This quote and tidbit I like are, "Miss-communication is a two way street," Gender roles should be 50 - 50. What she meant by the latter is that couples should do half the housework and be half a bread winner. I like that idea. I never liked the idea of giving up my passion of writing or my joy of working outside the home when I get married.
I have a love/hate relationship with being a leader. It's fun to be in charge because I get to use my creative ways and when the group is a passion or like a family, hopefully both.
I admire people who can put others in their place without anger or being mean. Granted, sometimes you need to be forceful to get the point across. Many times I tend to keep my mouth shut instead of standing up to bullies or people who just don't see all that I'm doing for them.
Recently, I've been reading the National Bestseller, "Lean In" and I'm loving it. This quote and tidbit I like are, "Miss-communication is a two way street," Gender roles should be 50 - 50. What she meant by the latter is that couples should do half the housework and be half a bread winner. I like that idea. I never liked the idea of giving up my passion of writing or my joy of working outside the home when I get married.
I have a love/hate relationship with being a leader. It's fun to be in charge because I get to use my creative ways and when the group is a passion or like a family, hopefully both.
I admire people who can put others in their place without anger or being mean. Granted, sometimes you need to be forceful to get the point across. Many times I tend to keep my mouth shut instead of standing up to bullies or people who just don't see all that I'm doing for them.
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