A heart too often broken,
keeping it wide open
isn't safe, yet I keep on
letting someone else in close
is a risk, yet I keep on
putting someone else in charge
is scary, yet I keep on
Wednesday, May 28, 2014
Saturday, May 24, 2014
Alone
Even though I have many friends, I feel alone. Why? We are now all separated by work and furthering our education after college. Communication is a huge deal to me when it comes to relationships and some just don't get it and I'm not sure how to help them see my dilemma. I love hanging out with them and when we can, we get together. Being back at Ithaca was awesome mainly because I was back "home" with my friends. They say home is where the heart is and my heart is in Ithaca. My real reality doesn't feel like home but just a place where I sleep and eat. My parents are there and occasionally my younger sister, but for the most part I don't have a reason to stick around.
Being alone stinks and is the worst part of post-grad life. Sure, I made friends at work and I like them, but never do things outside of work. I feel like I'm inside but still looking in, ya know? Sometimes there are fun outings with some kids from another church, so there's a plus. Maybe I shouldn't worry about this so much since I work a lot, but it's money or a social life. Why can't I have both? Someday, I will have a normal working job and will get to hang out with people my own age. Waiting for that day. Until then, I'm alone.
Being alone stinks and is the worst part of post-grad life. Sure, I made friends at work and I like them, but never do things outside of work. I feel like I'm inside but still looking in, ya know? Sometimes there are fun outings with some kids from another church, so there's a plus. Maybe I shouldn't worry about this so much since I work a lot, but it's money or a social life. Why can't I have both? Someday, I will have a normal working job and will get to hang out with people my own age. Waiting for that day. Until then, I'm alone.
Thursday, May 8, 2014
Family
Family doesn't have to just mean your flesh and blood, it can mean a church family, neighbors, best friends or a group/club you are a part of.
I'm blessed to have so many families and I cherish each one, at least I try to. These days those outside of my birth family, they are mostly older than 30. It's nice to hang out with people your own age. Who will disagree with that?
Loved being able to hang with my HOP family last weekend! It felt so good to be with them and really catch up. Even though, we live in the 21st century, it's hard to keep up with friends when they are busy.
For my birthday last year, I was happy to be with two older friends who took me out on a boat ride then lunch. They are both over 40, but fun to be around. I'm glad I had them to hang with otherwise I'd be by myself or with my parents all day.
Finding the silver lining in situations like this is what makes me smile. Someday when I'm on my own, I hope I will continue to look for the bight side in situations.
Never give up, no matter how bleak the situation is.
I'm blessed to have so many families and I cherish each one, at least I try to. These days those outside of my birth family, they are mostly older than 30. It's nice to hang out with people your own age. Who will disagree with that?
Loved being able to hang with my HOP family last weekend! It felt so good to be with them and really catch up. Even though, we live in the 21st century, it's hard to keep up with friends when they are busy.
For my birthday last year, I was happy to be with two older friends who took me out on a boat ride then lunch. They are both over 40, but fun to be around. I'm glad I had them to hang with otherwise I'd be by myself or with my parents all day.
Finding the silver lining in situations like this is what makes me smile. Someday when I'm on my own, I hope I will continue to look for the bight side in situations.
Never give up, no matter how bleak the situation is.
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